How to Start Over When You Don't Want to Start

How do you start over?

I feel like an expert in this because I have had to do it far too often. I've learned many tools and tricks over the years that I want to share with you. Here are some thoughts to help you convince yourself to go when you are having trouble starting.

1. Plan Day 1. Listen, you might want to run a marathon one day, but convincing yourself to run a marathon on Day 1 is deadly to your motivation. You're smarter than that, but do you realize that if you set a goal for running a marathon and don't have a plan for Day 1, you will feel a lot more pressure to perform and a lot more fear of failure? Most of the problem of failing to start is that fear, so alleviate it. Don't put pressure on yourself early on. You already have plenty of pressure, which is why you are not starting!
2. Give yourself easy wins at first. Speaking of planning Day 1, make success ridiculously easy. One of my times starting over I just set a goal to wake up, get dressed, and put my running shoes on. I did that, celebrated awkwardly, then went back to bed. I did it this way because I was not simply starting a running program again. I was also trying to train myself to do it in the early mornings - something I had never done before. I knew that I had to show myself that I could do it. So, I went light at first. And it worked! In fact, I did that several days. Next, I added another step: I opened the door. Once the door was open, I went outside and started warming up. From there a run was easy, natural. But I had already planned to do LESS than I wanted to do. Holding myself back was part of the plan. I did less than I wanted to do because I knew my tendency was to overdo it.
3. Talk to yourself. Self-talk is very important. You will eventually believe whatever you tell yourself, especially if you provide evidence that what you are saying is true. Give your brain something to hold onto, something to use to help convince you to do what you want. This does not need to be out loud unless you don't have an inner monologue. Either way, in your mind or out of your mouth, what you say will eventually win. So consistently tell yourself that you can do it and give evidence to support it.
4. Celebrate all wins. Pay attention to things that happen, challenges you overcome, even the simplest ones at first. If you felt sleepy when you woke up and you got out of bed, congratulate yourself. Use that as evidence that you are going to do it and that you CAN do it! When I say "celebrate" it is important to DO something in celebration. It doesn't need to be big. It doesn't need to cost money, but it should be immediate. Here are a few ideas.
   1. Smile and say out loud, "Good work!"
   2. Give yourself a "high five". If it feels corny, that's because it is. But your brain does not see it as such. Reach your hands over your head and slap them together while smiling and telling yourself you did good.
   3. Put a target on top of a door frame that only you will notice and when you come in from a run, slap it and tell yourself you did it and nothing stopped you.
   4. When you finally get started, take yourself out for a small treat that day. Get a cup of coffee or something. Even if you always get a cup, tell yourself that THIS cup is special because it is done in celebration.
   5. Allow yourself to feel good about accomplishing something.
5. Beware. You will be tempted to tell yourself, "This is stupid" when you celebrate small achievements. That is dangerous and unnecessary. The reason you are not starting is because you lost confidence in yourself at some point. Beating yourself up is unwise, especially at the beginning of something. Beginnings are extremely fragile. Realistically you might be weak. In a month you won't be giving yourself high-fives for getting out of bed and the idea may insult you then. But for now, admit that you are weaker than you want to be and take this as an opportunity to encourage yourself. It's like an ember that catches fire. If you nurture your spirit here, you will build a fire that will overcome many obstacles, but if you are rough with yourself here, you may never start again.